12am.com.au : Mixing Music Media - So Hot for 13th May


	.: So Hot Right Now...

date: 13th May 2005
columnist: Margaux "Its my lucky day" Carlos

So Hot…
GORILLAZ IN THE MIST
"Every great band is destroyed by their success: cartoon bands are no exception." So says Gorillaz guitarist Noodle, who took the helm for new album Demon Days, the follow-up to the band's multi-million selling debut Gorillaz. "Noodle wrote most of this album herself," says drummer Russel Hobbs. "Murdoc may try and take the credit for it, but from the basic sketches to the finished album, this was Noodle's vision." Demon Days will be released by Capitol music on 22nd May, and will be preceeded by the single Feel Good Inc, released 8th May.

Gorillaz are Noodle (guitar), 2-D (vocals), Murdoc Nicalls (bass), and Russel Hobbs (drums). Signed to Capitol music at their very first gig in 1998, their debut album Gorillaz (2001) has sold 6 million albums worldwide. The band is currently shooting a promo for Feel Good Inc. with video director Jamie Hewlett, starring the track's guest performers De La Soul alongside Gorillaz.

THE RAP CELLA IS LAUNCHED
Some claim to be the biggest and many say that they are the best, but there is no denying the sheer magnitude and comprehensiveness of information contained within the walls of THERAPCELLA. From it's infancy in 1994 as ‘the knowledge cella’, right through to its newly designed and expanded form, THERAPCELLA embraces and represents the many efforts of Rap Artists from around the globe. On a functional level, THERAPCELLA provides over 8000 pages of information, including individual profiles of over 3500 artists from over 15 countries. Featuring discographies and statistics on solo artists, groups, crews and labels, one of the most ground-breaking features of THERAPCELLA is that all information on the site can be grouped by country, year, artist or label. Unlike most other rap sites, THERAPCELLA is predominantly a raw data source. It does not feature any reviews or opinions, it does however feature a ‘fans favourites’ section, where rap fans and artists are invited to vote for their favourite releases for each year since 1980. These votes are tallied to form a top ten ladder of the ‘most voted for’ releases that will change with each new submission. As the most wide-ranging information source for anyone interested in rap music, THERAPCELLA aims to expose rap releases and artists regardless of where they are from, why they do it and whether they sell 500 or 10,000,000 units. "If you ain't in the cella, what ya rhymin for?"...Luckyiam.PSC (Living Legends / Mystik Journeymen) Check out all the action for yourself at www.therapcella.com

GURU TOUR DETAILS ANNOUNCED
After a brief recording hiatus, Guru, the legendary MC of the group Gangstarr and pioneer of the Hip Hop-Jazz fusion acclaimed in his Jazzmatazz series, has emerged from the studio where he and his producer Solar have completed their upcoming album, Guru VERSION 7.0 The Street Scriptures V7.0 The Street Scriptures showcases the new cutting edge sound created by Solar and Guru, complimenting the historical sound of Gangstarr, yet having the key elements of contemporary Hip-Hop. “I’m renewing my history – reinventing, yet, taking nothing away from what’s been already laid down by Gang Starr. This is me at the next level” says Guru. The first released single, Cave In, has already reached #1 on National Mix Show and College Radio charts in the US. Together with Solar, Guru is bringing his new sound on tour, giving Australian audiences the opportunity to hear him performing tracks from his new album, live on stage prior to the release of the album.

Joining them on wheels of steel will be New York’s underground mixtape legend DJ DOO WOP. Taught by a cousin of legend Grandmaster Flash from the age of 10, DOO WOP carries on the tradition of the mixtape the “other music industry” where labels don’t exist, there are no highly paid publicists, where the CDs are sold by vendors hawking them off dirty blankets on city streets and bootlegging is encouraged. Don’t miss this opportunity to see the legendary Guru, performing with Solar and Doo Wop in Australia’s premium intimate venues in June.

Tour Dates:
SYDNEY Thursday June 9 @ The Gaelic Club
MELBOURNE Friday June 10 @ The Prince
ADELAIDE Sunday June 12 @ The Shores
PERTH Saturday June 18 @ Heat Nightclub

STEWART & MELVILLE FOR REAL
After releasing the highly applauded “Scenes” EP late last year, Stewart & Melville return with their debut album You Are Real. You Are Real is a thing of spectral beauty, a true sonic adventure that never forgets the power of song. As the first symphonic strands unfurl, Stewart & Melville’s blueprint for wraparound pop perfection will become brilliantly clear. The journey to You Are Real has been one of global proportions and grand coincidence. Stewart hails from the south of New Zealand, Melville the north. Separate pilgrimages to London found them eventually converge in random fashion at seedy gigs and acid raves. When the party ended, both ended up in Sydney, and true to form met again, at a party. After creating the Scenes EP and signing to Vicious, they decided to get to work on a full length album. And what magical work it is.

HOT OFF THE PRESS
The world’s leading DJ Management Agency - MOST WANTED GLOBAL have officially announced the establishment of an Australian head-quarters in Sydney. With offices in the UK and North America, Most Wanted AU will cover the territories of Australia, NZ and Asia providing a global management solution for the artists on the Most Wanted Global roster. Most Wanted AU is pleased to announce the signing of two of Australia’s leading and most exciting talents to the Most Wanted Australia Roster - Australia’s No#2 Mark Dynamix and Australia’s youngest professional DJ – TyDi!! TyDi is an amazing talent who belies his age! At just 17 years of age, TyDi has already played alongside the world’s leading DJ's at events such as Slinky, Godskitchen & Advent*jah. With an artist album already underway, an 18th Birthday Tour of Australia and New Zealand on the cards for June and July and an exclusive invitation to study at the Australian Conservatorium of Music, 2005 is looking to be a great year for TyDi !!

On the international front Most Wanted Global represents such talent as John 00 Fleming, Tomcraft, Anne Savage, JDS, Tim Healey, Disciples of Sound; the EXTREME artists of Andy Farley, Nick Sentience, Ed Real and James Lawson in addition to the entire TIDY Management roster for the world!! The Sydney launch of Most Wanted AU will be held @ Gas Nightclub on Saturday May 21st with James Lawson (EXTREME / Edison Factor / UK) headlining and support by the new Most Wanted signing DJ TyDi (Most Wanted AU) and the usual Progress residents. For more info on any Most Wanted artist look to: www.mostwantedglobal.com

So Not…
TASMANIA
It’s too far for my baby to be leaving me for there every 8 weeks, I don’t care if it’s for work!

GAY BOYS
That try to pick up my poor defenceless drunk baby in Tassie, I don’t care if Anthony went up to him first just so he would have someone with all their teeth to talk to!

MY BABY
Who can get very silly sometimes with his words and actions. Hot tip babes – absence does not make my heart grow fonder!

GPS PHONECARDS
That say you have 46 minutes then cut you off after 33 minutes then when you call customer service to find out what is going on, get put on hold for 13 minutes to terrible muzak before dropping out! Even worse is when you call again to get put on hold (and more behind the queue of irate customers) and drop out again! Can’t a girl just wish her mother a happy birthday?! Peeps, forewarned is forearmed!

WAITING FOR SHOES THAT WAS ORDERED AND PAID FOR 3 MONTHS AGO
And still waiting…

So What…
What the?

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a university chemistry exam. The answer by one student was so profound that the professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student however wrote the following.

First we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time, so we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell it will not leave. Therefore no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell let’s look at different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With the birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially
. Now we look at the rate of change of volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1 If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2 If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So what is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my freshman year that “It will be cold day in Hell before I sleep with you” and take into account that I slept with her last night then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore extinct leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of divine being which explains why last night Teresa kept shouting “Oh my God”

This student received the only “A”

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"It's hard waking up and not liking yourself."
- Kelly Osbourne

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